Talking to myself

12:44 PM

Chatterbox and I were at the park one morning a few days ago. We were by ourselves for a bit until some older folks came along to it on the bench and enjoy the cool morning air. Then another mom and her little girl came. Chatterbox came down the slide, then I set her back up and she came down again. Then she tried to climb up the slide and needed to be redirected. She looked at me and "talked" and I talked back and suddenly, being about three feet away from an older woman sitting on the bench I realized that I was talking out loud a lot. To a baby. Who doesn't yet speak.

The older woman said nothing. But I started to get a bit self-conscious. Determined to at least stop saying "dica, dica, dica" back to Chatterbox every time she said it to me (which was about every two minutes) I straightened out my shoulders and walked back to the slide stairs with confidence.

It took me about two minutes to find my resolution was impossible. Then I heard myself asking Chatterbox what we should do: should we go get our errands done, run get a coffee, was she hungry?"

Seriously, I probably looked like a poor, said woman who had no friends and used my child as my way of pretending I was fine about it. But I swear I do have friends. I caught the older woman eying me at that point. So I tried to close my mouth. Then a fat raindrop fell down and I felt the need to inform Miss Chatterbox that it might rain. After coaxing her into the stroller, which I felt was necessary talk and quite frankly she was looking at me very intently like she understood everything I was saying, I asked her what we should make for lunch.


But just as we left I heard someone talking. I turned around, arming myself to speak French to the other mom at the park when I realized she wasn't talking to me. She was talking to her daughter. And she was asking her what they should do next: go to the store or to the pharmacy?

Conclusion: toddlers are awesome because having one means you can talk out loud about whatever is in your head and no one thinks you are crazy. And no one comes back with  snide comment or whine.

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